The Catcher in the Rye

Chapter 5

5	5
U Pensiju smo subotom uveče uvek dobijali isto jelo. To je kao trebalo da bude posebna čast, jer su nam davali biftek.	WE ALWAYS HAD the same meal on Saturday nights at Pencey. It was supposed to be a big deal, because they gave you steak.
Kladio bih se u hiljadu dolara da su to radili samo zato što mnogi roditelji dolaze nedeljom u posetu, pa je stari Tarmer verovatno zamišljao da će svaka majka pitati svog zlatnog sinčića šta je prethodnog dana večerao, a onda će on reći: "Biftek". Kakva prevara.	I'll bet a thousand bucks the reason they did that was because a lot of guys' parents came up to school on Sunday, and old Thurmer probably figured everybody's mother would ask their darling boy what he had for dinner last night, and he'd say, "Steak." What a racket. You should've seen the steaks.
Trebalo je videti te bifteke. Nešto malo, tvrdo i suvo, jedva je moglo da se seče. Uz te bifteke smo uvek dobijali neki zgrudvani pire od krompira, a za dezert 'Braon Beti', neki kolač od jabuka koji niko nije jeo, osim možda onih klinaca iz nižih razreda što nisu ni znali za bolje - i likova kao što je Ekli, koji sve jedu.	They were these little hard, dry jobs that you could hardly even cut. You always got these very lumpy mashed potatoes on steak night, and for dessert you got Brown Betty, which nobody ate, except maybe the little kids in the lower school that didn't know any better―and guys like Ackley that ate everything.
Lepo je bilo, ipak, kad smo izašli iz sale za ručavanje. Napadalo je bar deset santimetara snega i vejalo je kao ludo. Bilo je neviđeno lepo i svi smo počeli da se grudvamo i jurcamo na sve strane. Vrlo detinjasto, ali svi su istinski uživali u tome.	It was nice, though, when we got out of the dining room. There were about three inches of snow on the ground, and it was still coming down like a madman. It looked pretty as hell, and we all started throwing snowballs and horsing around all over the place. It was very childish, but everybody was really enjoying themselves.
Nisam izlazio s nekom devojkom ili negde, pa smo ja i taj moj drugar, Mel Brosar, član rvačke ekipe, rešili da odemo autobusom do Edžerstauna i tamo uzmemo po hamburger i možda odgledamo neki glupi film. Ni ja ni on nismo bili raspoloženi da zaglavimo čitavu noć u sobi.	I didn't have a date or anything, so I and this friend of mine, Mal Brossard, that was on the wrestling team, decided we'd take a bus into Agerstown and have a hamburger and maybe see a lousy movie. Neither of us felt like sitting around on our ass all night.
Pitao sam Mela ima li nešto protiv da i Ekli pođe sa nama. Pitao sam to zato što Ekli nikad ništa nije radio subotom uveče, samo je sedeo u sobi i cedio bubuljice ili nešto.	I asked Mal if he minded if Ackley came along with us. The reason I asked was because Ackley never did anything on Saturday night, except stay in his room and squeeze his pimples or something.
Mel je rekao da nema ništa protiv, ali nije bio oduševljen tom idejom. Nije baš obožavao Eklija.	Mal said he didn't mind but that he wasn't too crazy about the idea. He didn't like Ackley much.
Sve u svemu, obojica smo otišli gore u sobe da se spremimo i sve i, dok sam obuvao kaljače i ostalo, doviknuo sam Ekliju hoće li u bioskop. Lepo je mogao da me čuje kroz one zavese oko tuša, ali nije odmah odgovorio.	Anyway, we both went to our rooms to get ready and all, and while I was putting on my galoshes and crap, I yelled over and asked old Ackley if he wanted to go to the movies. He could hear me all right through the shower curtains, but he didn't answer me right away.
Takvi tipovi mrze da vam odmah odgovore. Najzad se pojavio, kroz proklete zavese, stao na ivicu tuš-kade i pitao ko sve ide osim mene.	He was the kind of a guy that hates to answer you right away. Finally he came over, through the goddam curtains, and stood on the shower ledge and asked who was going besides me.
Uvek je morao da zna ko sve ide. Kunem se, kad bi taj tip doživeo negde brodolom, a ti ga spaseš prokletim čamcem, obavezno bi pitao ko vesla u čamcu pre nego što bi ušao.	He always had to know who was going. I swear, if that guy was shipwrecked somewhere, and you rescued him in a goddam boat, he'd want to know who the guy was that was rowing it before he'd even get in.
Rekao sam mu da ide i Mel Brosar. "Taj kreten..." rekao je. "U redu. Pričekaj malo." Bilo je kao da ti čini ne znam kakvu uslugu.	I told him Mal Brossard was going. He said, " That bastard ... All right. Wait a second." You'd think he was doing you a big favor.
Trebalo mu je jedno pet sati da se spremi. Dok sam ga čekao, otvorio sam prozor i napravio grudvu. Sneg je bio odličan za grudve. Ali nisam je bacio na nešto.	It took him about five hours to get ready. While he was doing it, I went over to my window and opened it and packed a snowball with my bare hands. The snow was very good for packing. I didn't throw it at anything, though.
Krenuo sam bio da je bacim. Na auto koji je bio parkiran s druge strane ulice. Ali predomislio sam se. Automobil je izgledao tako lep i beo.	I started to throw it. At a car that was parked across the street. But I changed my mind. The car looked so nice and white.
Onda sam krenuo da je bacim na hidrant, ali i on je izgledao previše lep i beo. Na kraju je uopšte nisam bacio. Samo sam zatvorio prozor i šetao s grudvom po sobi, stiskajući je da bude što tvrđa. Malo kasnije, još sam je imao kad smo ja, Brosar i Ekli ušli u autobus.	Then I started to throw it at a hydrant, but that looked too nice and white, too. Finally I didn't throw it at anything. All I did was close the window and walk around the room with the snowball, packing it harder. A little while later, I still had it with me when I and Brossard and Ackley got on the bus.
Vozač je otvorio vrata i naterao me da je bacim. Rekao sam mu da neću nikoga da gađam, ali nije mi verovao. Ljudi nikad ne veruju kad im nešto kažete.	The bus driver opened the doors and made me throw it out. I told him I wasn't going to chuck it at anybody, but he wouldn't believe me. People never believe you.
Brosar i Ekli su već gledali film koji se davao pa smo samo uzeli hamburgere i malo igrali flipere, a onda se vratili autobusom u Pensi. Nije mi bilo preterano žao što nisam gledao film. To je izgleda bila neka komedija, s Keri Grantom i ostalim fazonima.	Brossard and Ackley both had seen the picture that was playing, so all we did, we just had a couple of hamburgers and played the pinball machine for a little while, then took the bus back to Pencey. I didn't care about not seeing the movie, anyway. It was supposed to be a comedy, with Cary Grant in it, and all that crap.
Osim toga, bio sam već jednom u bioskopu s Eklijem i Brosarom. Obojica su se smejali kao hijene stvarima koje nisu bile čak ni smešne. Nije mi prijalo ni da sedim u bioskopu pored njih.	Besides, I'd been to the movies with Brossard and Ackley before. They both laughed like hyenas at stuff that wasn't even funny. I didn't even enjoy sitting next to them in the movies.
Bilo je tek petnaest do devet kad smo se vratili u Pensi. Stari Brosar je bio zaluđen za bridž pa je otišao da iskopa neko društvo za partiju.	It was only about a quarter to nine when we got back to the dorm. Old Brossard was a bridge fiend, and he started looking around the dorm for a game.
Ekli se usidrio u mojoj sobi, tek onako, za promenu. Samo, umesto da sedne na naslon Stredleterove fotelje, legao je ovog puta na moj krevet, s licem nasred mog jastuka i svega.	Old Ackley parked himself in my room, just for a change. Only, instead of sitting on the arm of Stradlater's chair, he laid down on my bed, with his face right on my pillow and all.
Počeo je da govori onim monotonim glasom, cedeći usput sve one bubuljice. Uputio sam bar hiljadu aluzija da ga se otarasim, ali ništa nije vredelo.	He started talking in this very monotonous voice, and picking at all his pimples. I dropped about a thousand hints, but I couldn't get rid of him.
Samo je i dalje tupio tim stravično monotonim glasom, sve o istoj ribi s kojom je kao imao seksualni odnos prethodnog leta. Pričao mi je već milion puta o tome, i svaki put je bilo drukčije.	All he did was keep talking in this very monotonous voice about some babe he was supposed to have had sexual intercourse with the summer before. He'd already told me about it about a hundred times.Every time he told it, it was different.
Čas joj ga davao u 'bjuiku' nekog rođaka, čas ga je primala ispod nekog nadvožnjaka. Sve su to bile obične gluposti, naravno. Ako je iko bio nevin, to je bio on. Sumnjam čak da je ikad pipnuo neku devojku.	One minute he'd be giving it to her in his cousin's Buick, the next minute he'd be giving it to her under some boardwalk. It was all a lot of crap, naturally. He was a virgin if ever I saw one. I doubt if he ever even gave anybody a feel.
Sve u svemu, na kraju sam morao da budem otvoren i kažem mu kako treba da napišem sastav za Stredletera i da je poželjno da se izgubi već jednom iz sobe kako bih mogao da se koncentrišem. Najzad je to i uradio, ali mu je, po običaju, trebalo dosta vremena za to.	Anyway, finally I had to come right out and tell him that I had to write a composition for Stradlater, and that he had to clear the hell out, so I could concentrate. He finally did, but he took his time about it, as usual.
Kad je otišao, obukao sam pidžamu i bade-mantil, stavio onu lovačku kapu na glavu i počeo da pišem sastav.	After he left, I put on my pajamas and bathrobe and my old hunting hat, and started writing the composition.
Problem je bio što nisam mogao da se setim neke sobe ili kuće ili nečega što bih opisao na način kako je to Stredleter tražio. Nisam baš lud za opisivanjem nekih kuća ili soba. I tako, napisao sam nešto o rukavici za bezbol moga brata Elija.	The thing was, I couldn't think of a room or a house or anything to describe the way Stradlater said he had to have. I'm not too crazy about describing rooms and houses anyway. So what I did, I wrote about my brother Allie's baseball mitt.
Bila je vrlo zgodna za opisivanje. Najozbiljnije. Moj brat Eli imao je tu bezbol-rukavicu za levu ruku.	It was a very descriptive subject. It really was. My brother Allie had this left-handed fielder's mitt.
Bio je levak. Ta rukavica je bila zgodna za opisivanje zato što su svuda po njoj - po prstima i svuda preko nje - bile ispisane pesme. I to zelenim mastilom. Ispisao ih je po njoj da bi imao nešto za čitanje kad je u polju, dok još niko ne tuče loptu.	He was left-handed. The thing that was descriptive about it, though, was that he had poems written all over the fingers and the pocket and everywhere. In green ink. He wrote them on it so that he'd have something to read when he was in the field and nobody was up at bat.
Sada je mrtav. Dobio je leukemiju i umro kad smo živeli u Mejnu, 18. jula 1946. Sigurno bi vam se dopao.	He's dead now. He got leukemia and died when we were up in Maine, on July 18, 1946. You'd have liked him.

Bio je dve godine mlađi od mene, ali bar pedeset puta inteligentniji. Bio je stravično pametan. Njegovi nastavnici su uvek pisali majci pisma o tome kakvo je zadovoljstvo imati u razredu dečaka kao što je Eli.	He was two years younger than I was, but he was about fifty times as intelligent. He was terrifically intelligent. His teachers were always writing letters to my mother, telling her what a pleasure it was having a boy like Allie in their class.
A to nisu bile prazne priče. Tako su i mislili. Ali stvar nije samo u tome što je bio najpametniji u porodici.	And they weren't just shooting the crap. They really meant it. But it wasn't just that he was the most intelligent member in the family.
Bio je i najbolji, po mnogo čemu. Nikada se nije ni na koga ljutio ili nešto. Kažu da se riđokosi ljudi vrlo lako naljute, ali kod Elija to nije bio slučaj, iako je imao upadljivo crvenu kosu.	He was also the nicest, in lots of ways. He never got mad at anybody. People with red hair are supposed to get mad very easily, but Allie never did, and he had very red hair.
Reći ću vam kakvu je crvenu kosu imao. Počeo sam da igram golf već u desetoj godini. Sećam se, jednog leta kad mi je bilo oko dvanaest, baš kad sam lansirao lopticu i sve, najednom sam kao osetio da ću, ako se okrenem, videti Elija.	I'll tell you what kind of red hair he had. I started playing golf when I was only ten years old. I remember once, the summer I was around twelve, teeing off and all, and having a hunch that if I turned around all of a sudden, I'd see Allie.
Osvrnuo sam se i, naravno, sedeo je na svom biciklu iza ograde - oko čitavog terena bila je ograda - sedeo je tamo, jedno sto metara iza mene, gledajući me kako igram. Takvu je crvenu kosu imao. Ljudi moji, stvarno je bio dobar klinac.	So I did, and sure enough, he was sitting on his bike outside the fence―there was this fence that went all around the course―and he was sitting there, about a hundred and fifty yards behind me, watching me tee off. That's the kind of red hair he had. God, he was a nice kid, though.
Ponekad bi se toliko zasmejao nečemu što bi mu palo na pamet za stolom, usred večere, da je gotovo padao sa stolice. Bilo mi je samo trinaest godina, i hteli su da me vode kod psihologa jer sam porazbijao sve prozore na garaži. Ne krivim ih.	He used to laugh so hard at something he thought of at the dinner table that he just about fell off his chair. I was only thirteen, and they were going to have me psychoanalyzed and all, because I broke all the windows in the garage. I don't blame them.
Ozbiljno. Te noći kada je umro, spavao sam u garaži i pesnicom polupao sve proklete prozore na njoj, tek tako. Pokušao sam čak da polupam i prozore na 'kara-vanu' koji smo imali tog leta, ali mi je šaka već bila slomljena i sve, pa nisam mogao.	I really don't. I slept in the garage the night he died, and I broke all the goddam windows with my fist, just for the hell of it. I even tried to break all the windows on the station wagon we had that summer, but my hand was already broken and everything by that time, and I couldn't do it.
Bilo je veoma glupo uraditi tako nešto, priznajem, ali jedva da sam uopšte znao šta radim, a vi niste poznavali Elija. Šaka me i sada ponekad boli, kad pada kiša ili nešto, i ne mogu više da stegnem pesnicu - onako čvrsto, mislim - ali nisam preterano zabrinut zbog toga. Ionako ne nameravam da budem neki prokleti hirurg ili violinista ili ne znam šta.	It was a very stupid thing to do, I'll admit, but I hardly didn't even know I was doing it, and you didn't know Allie. My hand still hurts me once in a while when it rains and all, and I can't make a real fist any more―not a tight one, I mean―but outside of that I don't care much. I mean I'm not going to be a goddam surgeon or a violinist or anything anyway.
Sve u svemu, o tome sam napisao Stredleterov sastav. O Elijevoj rukavici za bezbol.	Anyway, that's what I wrote Stradlater's composition about. Old Allie's baseball mitt.
Slučajno sam je imao tu, u koferu, pa sam je izvadio i prepisao pesme koje su bile ispisane po njoj. Sve što je trebalo da uradim bilo je da promenim Elijevo ime, tako da niko ne zna da je on bio moj brat a ne Stredleterov.	I happened to have it with me, in my suitcase, so I got it out and copied down the poems that were written on it. All I had to do was change Allie's name so that nobody would know it was my brother and not Stradlater's.
Nisam bio preterano oduševljen što to radim, ali nisam mogao da se setim ničega tako zgodnog za opisivanje. Osim toga, nekako mi se dopalo da pišem o tome.	I wasn't too crazy about doing it, but I couldn't think of anything else descriptive. Besides, I sort of liked writing about it.
Trebalo mi je oko sat vremena, jer sam morao da upotrebim izakanu Stredleterovu mašinu koja mi je svaki čas zapinjala. Nisam upotrebio moju zato što sam je pozajmio jednom učeniku iz druge sobe.	It took me about an hour, because I had to use Stradlater's lousy typewriter, and it kept jamming on me. The reason I didn't use my own was because I'd lent it to a guy down the hall.
Bilo je oko pola jedanaest, mislim, kada sam završio. Nisam bio nešto umoran pa sam malo gledao kroz prozor.	It was around ten-thirty, I guess, when I finished it. I wasn't tired, though, so I looked out the window for a while.
Napolju nije više padao sneg, ali se odnekud povremeno čuo zvuk automobila koji je neko uzalud pokušavao da pokrene. Čulo se i kako stari Ekli hrče u svojoj sobi.	It wasn't snowing out any more, but every once in a while you could hear a car somewhere not being able to get started. You could also hear old Ackley snoring.
Lepo se čulo kroz one zavese oko tuša. Imao je probleme sa sinusima pa je teško disao u snu.	Right through the goddam shower curtains you could hear him. He had sinus trouble and he couldn't breathe too hot when he was asleep.
Taj lik je imao sve živo. Bolesne sinuse, bubuljice, kvarne zube, zadah iz usta, kvrgave nokte. Čovek je morao pomalo i da žali tog suludog skota.	That guy had just about everything. Sinus trouble, pimples, lousy teeth, halitosis, crumby fingernails. You had to feel a little sorry for the crazy sonuvabitch.

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