The Big Sleep

Chapter 31

31
The butler appeared with my hat. I put it on and said: “What do you think of him?”	Batler se pojavio s mojim šeširom. Stavio sam ga na glavu i rekao: — Što mislite o njemu?
“He’s not as weak as he looks, sir.”	— Nije tako slab kako izgleda.
“If he was, he’d be ready for burial. What did this Regan fellow have that bored into him so?”	— Da jest, bio bi spreman za pokop. Što je taj druškan Regan imao u sebi, da mu je tako prirastao?
The butler looked at me levelly and yet with a queer lack of expression. “Youth, sir,” he said. “And the soldier’s eye.”	Batler me je pogledao u oči, pa ipak s neobičnim nedostatkom izraza. — Mladost, sir — rekao je. — I vojničko gledanje.
“Like yours,” I said.	— Kao vaše — rekoh.
“If I may say so, sir, not unlike yours.”	— Ako smijem reći, sir, ne različito od vašeg.
“Thanks. How are the ladies this morning?” He shrugged politely.	— Hvala. Kako su dame jutros? Uljudno je slegnuo ramenima.
“Just what I thought,” I said, and he opened the door for me.	— Baš kako sam i mislio — rekao sam, a on mi je otvorio vrata.
I stood outside on the step and looked down the vistas of grassed terraces and trimmed trees and flowerbeds to the tall metal railing at the bottom of the gardens. I saw Carmen about halfway down, sitting on a stone bench, with her head between her hands, looking forlorn and alone.	Zastao sam vani na stepenici i pogledao niz perspektivu travom zasijanih terasa, podšišanog drveća i cvjetnih gredica sve do visoke metalne ograde na,.dnu vrtova. Ugledao sam Carmen otprilike na pola puta nizbrdo, kako sjedi na kamenoj klupi s glavom u rukama f izgledala je osamljeno i napušteno.
I went down the red brick steps that led from terrace to terrace. I was quite close before she heard me. She jumped up and whirled like a cat. She wore the light blue slacks she had worn the first time I saw her. Her blond hair was the same loose tawny wave. Her face was white. Red spots flared in her cheeks as she looked at me. Her eyes were slaty.	Sišao sam niz stepenice od crvene opeke što su vodile od terase do terase. Sasvim sam joj se primakao prije no što me je čula. Skočila je i zavrtjela se poput mačke. Nosila je svijetloplave hlače što ih je imala na sebi kad sam je prvi put ugledao. Plava joj je kosa bila onaj isti slobodni žuto-smeđi val. Lice joj je bilo bijelo. Crvene su joj mrlje planule na obrazima kad me je ugledala. Oči su joj bile boje škriljca.
“Bored?” I said.	— Dosađujete se? — rekoh.
She smiled slowly, rather shyly, then nodded quickly. Then she whispered: “You’re not mad at me?”	Nasmiješila se polako, prilično polako, i brzo kimnu-la. Tad je prošaptala: — Ne pigate se na mene?
“I thought you were mad at me.”	— Mislio sam da se vi ljutite na mene.
She put her thumb up and giggled. “I’m not.” When she giggled I didn’t like her any more. I looked around. A target hung on a tree about thirty feet away, with some darts sticking to it. There were three or four more on the stone bench where she had been sitting.	Podigla je palac i zahihotala. — Ne, ne. — Kad je za-hihotala nije mi se više dopadala. Osvrnuo sam se uokolo. Na nekih deset metara dalekom drvetu visjela je meta; iz nje je štrcalo nekoliko projektila. Bila su još tri ili četiri na kamenoj klupi na kojoj je sjedila.
“For people with money you and your sister don’t seem to have much fun,” I said.	— Za ljude koji imaju novce, vi i vaša sestra kao da i nemate mnogo zabave — rekoh.
She looked at me under her long lashes. This was the look that was supposed to make me roll over on my back. I said: “You like throwing those darts?”	Pogledala me ispod svojih dugačkih trepavica. Bio je to pogled za koji se pretpostavljalo da će me svaliti na leđa. Rekoh: — Volite bacati te strelice?
“Uh-huh.”	— A-ha.
“That reminds me of something.” I looked back towards the house. By moving about three feet I made a tree hide me from it. I took her little pearl-handled gun out of my pocket. “I brought you back your artillery. I cleaned it and loaded it up. Take my tip — don’t shoot it at people, unless you get to be a better shot. Remember?”	— To me podsjeća na nešto. — Osvrnuo sam se prema kući. Pomaknuvši se za oko metar postigao sam da me drvo zakloni od nje. Izvadio sam iz džepa mali pištolj sa sedefnom drškom. — Donio sam vam natrag vašu artiljeriju. Nauljio sam ga i nabio. Poslušajte savjet: ne pucajte u ljude, ukoliko ne postanete bolji strijelac. Zapamtila?
Her face went paler and her thin thumb dropped. She looked at me, then at the gun I was holding. There was a fascination in her eyes. “Yes,” she said, and nodded. Then suddenly: “Teach me to shoot.”	Lice joj je postalo bljeđe, a tanki joj je palac pao. Pogledala je najprije u mene, a zatim u pištolj što sam ga držao. U njenim je očima bila fascinacija. — Jesam — rekla je i kimnula. Tada naglo: — Naučite me pucati.
“Huh?”	— Ha?
“Teach me how to shoot. I’d like that.”	— Naučite me kako da gađam. Voljela bih to.
“Here? It’s against the law.”	— Ovdje? To je protuzakonito.
She came close to me and took the gun out of my hand, cuddled her hand around the butt. Then she tucked it quickly inside her slacks, almost with a furtive movement, and looked around.	Primakla mi se i uzela pištolj iz ruke i zatim mu mazno obuhvatila kundak. Tad ga je brzo turnula u hlače, gotovo kradomičnim okretom, i pogledala okolo.
“I know where,” she said in a secret voice. “Down by some of the old wells.” She pointed off down the hill. “Teach me?”	— Znam gdje — rekla je tajnovitim glasom. — Dolje, pokraj starih naftnih izvora. — Uprla je u daljinu, niz brdo. — Hoćete?
I looked into her slaty blue eyes. I might as well have looked at a couple of bottle-tops. “All right. Give me back the gun until I see if the place looks all right.”	Pogledao sam u njene škriljastoplave oči. Mogao sam isto tako pogledati i u par grlića. — U redu. Vratite mi pištolj dok ne vidim je li mjesto u redu.
She smiled and made a mouth, then handed it back with a secret naughty air, as if she was giving me a key to her room. We walked up the steps and around to my car. The gardens seemed deserted. The sunshine was as empty as a headwaiter’s smile. We got into the car and I drove down the sunken driveway and out through the gates.	Nasmiješila se i nakreveljila, zatim mi ga vratila uz tajnovit, zločest izraz, kao da mi daje ključeve svoje sobe. Od-šetali smo uz stepenice i/zatim okolo do mog automobila. Vrtovi su izgledali napušteni. Sunčev je sjaj bio prazan kap smiješak glavnog konobara.-UšIFsrno~u kola i ja sam pove-žao niz utoriulii prilaznu cestu i zatim van kroz dveri.
“Where’s Vivian?” I asked.	— Gdje je Vivian? — upitah.
“Not up yet.” She giggled.	— Još nije ustala — zahihotala je.

I drove on down the hill through the quiet opulent streets with their faces washed by the rain, bore east to La Brea, then south. We reached the place she meant in about ten minutes.	Nastavio sam voziti nizbrdo kroz tihe bogatunske ulice s licima umivenim kišom, prorovao na istok do La Brea, i zatim prema jugu. Došli smo do mjesta na koje je mislila za oko deset minuta.
“In there.” She leaned out of the window and pointed.	— Tu uđite. — Nagnula.se kroz prozor i uprla prstom.
It was a narrow dirt road, not much more than a track, like the entrance to some foothill ranch. A wide five-barred gate was folded back against a stump and looked as if it hadn’t been shut in years. The road was fringed with tall eucalyptus trees and deeply rutted. Trucks had used it. It was empty and sunny now, but not yet dusty. The rain had been too hard and too recent.	Bila je to uska zemljana cesta, ne više od kolotečine, nalik na pristup kakvom prigorskom rancu. Široka vrata s pet prečki bila su otvorena do nekog panja koji ili je zaustavio, a izgledala su kao da ih nitko nije godinama zatvorio. Cesta je bila obrubljena visokim eukaliptusima i duboko izbrazdana kolskim brazdama. Kamioni su je istrošili. Sad je bila prazna i sunčana, ali ne i prašnjava. Kiše su bile prejake i premalo je vremena proteklo otkako su prestale.
I followed the ruts along and the noise of city traffic grew curiously and quickly faint, as if this were not in the city at all, but far away in a daydream land. Then the oil-stained, motionless walking beam of a squat wooden derrick stuck up over a branch. I could see the rusty old steel cable that connected this walking-beam with a half a dozen others. The beams didn’t move, probably hadn’t moved for a year. The wells were no longer pumping. There was a pile of rusted pipe, a loading platform that sagged at one end, half a dozen empty oil drums lying in a ragged pile. There was the stagnant, oil-scummed water of an old sump iridescent in the sunlight.	Slijedio sam kolske brazde dok je buka gradskog prometa čudesno i zanimljivo brzo slabila, kao da to uopće nije bilo u gradu, nego daleko negdje u zemlji sanja. Iznad granja je provirio glavu naftom umazan i nepomičan krak zdepaste drvene stap ne pumpe. Mogao sam vidjeti zarđalo čelično čelo što je ovaj krak povezivalo s pol tuceta drugih. Krakovi se nisu micali, i vjerojatno se već godinama nisu pomakli. Iz vrela se više nije ispumpavalo. Bila je tu i gomila zarđalih cijevi, teretna platforma utonula na jednome kraju, desetak praznih naftnih bačava što su ležale u nesuvisloj hrpi. U staroj kaljužnoj jami stajala je nepomična naftom pokrivena voda, što se na suncu prelijevala u svim duginim bojama.
“Are they going to make a park of all this?” I asked. She dipped her chin down and gleamed at me.	— Zar će iz svega ovoga napraviti park? — upitao sam. Ona je spustila bradu i bacila pogled na mene.
“It’s about time. The smell of that sump would poison a herd of goats. This the place you had in mind?”	— I krajnje je vrijeme. Zadah bi te jame potrovao stado koza. To je mjesto koje ste imali na umu?
“Uh-huh. Like it?”	— A-ha. Sviđa?
“It’s beautiful.” I pulled up beside the loading platform. We got out. I listened. The hum of the traffic was a distant web of sound, like the buzzing of bees. The place was as lonely as a churchyard. Even after the rain the tall eucalyptus trees still looked dusty. They always look dusty. A branch broken off by the wind had fallen over the edge of the sump and the flat leathery leaves dangled in the water.	— Prekrasno je. — Zaustavio sam pokraj teretne platforme. Izašli smo. Oslušnuo sam. Brojanje je prometa bilo tanka paučina zvukova, nalik na zujanje pčela. Mjesto je bilojjsamrjeno kao crkveno dvorište. Čak i nakon kiše vi-soikTsu eukaliptusi djelovali prašnjavo. Oni su uvijek djelovali prašnjavo. Grana odlomljena vjetrom pala je preko ruba jame i plosnati su se kožnati listovi zibali u vodi.
I walked around the sump and looked into the pump house. There was some junk in it, nothing that looked like recent activity. Outside a big wooden bull wheel was tilted against the wall. It looked like a good place all right.	Opšetao sam oko jame i pogledao u pumpnu stanicu. Unutra je bilo samo nešto starudije, no ništa što bi upući- valo na nedavnu aktivnost. Vani joj je na zid bio nagnut veliki drveni kotač mašinerije. Činilo se kao dobro mjesto, sasvim u redu.
I went back to the car. The girl stood beside it preening her hair and holding it out in the sun. “Gimme,” she said, and held her hand out.	Vratio sam se do automobila. Cura je stajala kraj njega, razmrsivala kosu i izlagala je suncu. — Dajte — rekla je i ispružila ruku.
I took the gun out and put it in her palm. I bent down and picked up a rusty can.	Izvadio sam pištolj i stavio joj ga na dlan. Sagnuo sam se i pokupio zarđalu konzervu.
“Take it easy now,” I said. “It’s loaded in all five. I’ll go over and set this can in that square opening in the middle of that big wooden wheel. See?” I pointed. She ducked her head, delighted. “That’s about thirty feet. Don’t start shooting until I get back beside you. Okay?”	— Sad samo mirno — rekoh. — Nabijen je u svih pet komora. Ja ću prijeći tamo i postaviti konzervu u onaj kvadratni otvor u sredini onog velikog drvenog kotača. Shvaćate? — Upro sam prstom. Prignula je glavu, razveseljena. — To je oko deset metara. Ne počinjite pucati dok se ne vratim do vas. Okej ?
“Okay,” she giggled.	— Okej — zahihotala je.
I went back around the sump and set the can up in the middle of the bull wheel. It made a swell target. If she missed the can, which she was certain to do, she would probably hit the wheel. That would stop a small slug completely. However, she wasn’t going to hit even that.	Vratio sam se oko jame i postavio konzervu u sredinu kotača. Bila je to mala meta. Ako promaši konzervu, a što će sigurno učiniti, vjerojatno će pogoditi kotač. On će potpuno zaustaviti malo zrno. Neće, međutim, pogoditi čak ni to.
I went back towards her around the sump. When I was about ten feet from her, at the edge of the sump, she showed me all her sharp little teeth and brought the gun up and started to hiss.	Krenuo sam natrag prema njoj oko jame. Kad sam se našao na oko deset metara od nje, na rubu jame, pokazala mi je sve svoje oštre zubiće, podigla pištolj i počela psika-ti.
I stopped dead, the sump water stagnant and stinking at my back.	Zastao sam kao skamenjen, dok mi je za leđima zaudarala nepokretna kaljuža.
“Stand there, you son of a bitch,” she said.	— Stoj tu, ti kujin sine — rekla je.
The gun pointed at my chest. Her hand seemed to be quite steady. The hissing sound grew louder and her face had the scraped bone look. Aged, deteriorated, become animal, and not a nice animal.	Pištolj mi je bio uperen u prsa. Činilo se da joj je ruka sasvim mirna. Psikavi je zvuk postao glasniji, a lice joj je dobilo izgled ostrugane kosti. Ostarjela, istrošena, pretvorena u životinju, i to ne u lijepu životinju.
I laughed at her. I started to walk towards her. I saw her small finger tighten on the trigger and grow white at the tip. I was about six feet away from her when she started to shoot.	Nasmijao sam joj se. Zakoračao sam prema njoj. Vidio sam kako se njen mali prst grči na obaraču i postaje bijel na vršku. Bio sam oko dva metra od nje kad je počela pucati.
The sound of the gun made a sharp slap, without body, a brittle crack in the sunlight. I didn’t see any smoke. I stopped again and grinned at her.	Pištolj je proizveo oštar pljesak, bez trajanja, lomni prasak na suncu. Nisam vidio nikakav dim. Ponovno sam stao i nacerio joj se.
She fired twice more, very quickly. I don’t think any of the shots would have missed. There were five in the little gun. She had fired four. I rushed her.	Ispalila je još dva, vrlo brzo. Nisam mislio da bi i jedan od tih hitaca promašio. Bilo ih je pet u malom pištolju. Ispalila je četiri. Bacio sam se na nju.
I didn’t want the last one in my face, so I swerved to one side. She gave it to me quite carefully, not worried at all. I think I felt the hot breath of the powder blast a little.	Nisam želio da posljednji dobijem u lice, i zato sam se izmaknuo u stranu. Poslala mi ga je vrlo pažljivo, baš ni malo zabrinuta. Mislim da sam pomalo osjetio vrući dah barutne eksplozije.
I straightened up. “My, but you’re cute,” I said.	Uspravila se. — Bože, baš ste cakani — rekoh.
Her hand holding the empty gun began to shake violently. The gun fell out of it. Her mouth began to shake. Her whole face went to pieces. Then her head screwed up towards her left ear and froth showed on her lips. Her breath made a whining sound. She swayed.	Njena ruka u kojoj je držala prazni pištolj počela se divlje tresti. Revolver joj je ispao iz nje. Usta su joj se počela trzati. Čitavo joj se lice rasulo. Tada joj se glava zasu-kala nalijevo i na usnama joj se pokazala pjena. Dah joj je proizveo plačni zvuk. Zanjihala se.
I caught her as she fell. She was already unconscious. I pried her teeth open with both hands and stuffed a wadded handkerchief in between them. It took all my strength to do it. I lifted her up and got her into the car, then went back for the gun and dropped it into my pocket. I climbed in under the wheel, backed the car and drove back the way we had come along the rutted road, out of the gateway, back up the hill and so home.	Uhvatio sam je u padu. Već je bila bez svijesti. Razvalio sam joj usta objema rukama i nabio maramicu skupljenu u grudu među zube. Trebala mi je sva snaga da to učinim. Podigao sam je i smjestio u kola, zatim se vratio po pištolj i spustio ga u džep. Popeo sam se za volan, povezao natraške i zatim natrag putem kojim smo i došli, izbrazda-nom cestom, pa kroz dveri, pa natrag uzbrdo i tako kući.
Carmen lay crumpled in the corner of the car, without motion. I was halfway up the drive to the house before she stirred. Then her eyes suddenly opened wide and wild. She sat up.	Carmen je ležala sklupčana u kutu automobila, bez i-jednog pokreta. Bili smo već na pola prilaznog puta do nje-iie kuće prije no što se pomakla. Tada su joj se oči naglo otvorile široko i divlje. Sjela je.
“What happened?” she gasped.	— Što se dogodilo? — dahnula je.
“Nothing. Why?”	— Ništa. Zašto?
“Oh, yes it did,” she giggled. “I wet myself.”	— O, dogodilo se — zahihotala je. — Upiškila sam se.
“They always do,” I said. She looked at me with a sudden sick speculation and began to moan.	— Njima se to stalno događa — rekoh. Pogledala me je vrteći nekakvu bolesnu nenadanu misao i počela ječati.

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